Tuesday, May 23, 2006

TEACHERS VS. EDUCATORS

Ya gotta love this principal. According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror. There are teachers.... and then there are educators.

Monday, May 22, 2006

STRIESAND DUMBFOUNDED


Barbra Streisand was more then a little annoyed when she found she didn't make Hillary's ipod list . She did say "that's ok I've been on Bill's ipod for years.

ACLU DEMANDS IT MUST COME DOWN


The ACLU filed papers today that the giant art work called Madonna and Cross must come down from its home in Inglewood. In response a friend of the court brief was filed in defense of the art and said she should hang there indefinitely.

NO ROOM FOR GRINGO'S

DATELINE (AP) Think again if you plan to go to Mexico for that new job interview as immigration laws make it tough for immigrants to Mexico to find certain jobs. J. Michael Waller, of the Center for Security Policy in Washington, stated. "If American policy-makers are looking for legal models on which to base new laws restricting immigration and expelling foreign lawbreakers, they have a handy guide: the Mexican constitution," he said in a recent article on immigration.

NAGIN SCHOOL BUS EXPRESS


Dateline CNN The election is over and the results could only mean that there is truth in post traumatic stress syndrome or liberals are all forgiving and people get the government they deserve. He was quoted as saying regarding President Bush"We now have $3 billion for levees," Nagin said. "We have $8 billion for incentives. We have $10 billion for housing. You are delivering on your promise, and I want to thank you for all of the citizens of the city of New Orleans." I might even spend some on the levee's this time. He went on to say "As another great president once said The Bus Stops Here.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

CASTRO FOR ANOTHER 60 YEARS?

Remembering the fate of Dr. Oscar Biscet. Catsro's Doctor, Eugene Selman-Housein stated Castro will live to be
140 Las Vegas odds maker say its even money he doesn't.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

THIS WEEK IN CALIFORNIA

Do you know what happened this week back in 1850 in California?

California became a state.
The State had no electricity.
The State had no money.
Almost everyone spoke Spanish.
There were gun fights in the streets.

So basically, it was just like California today except the women had
real breasts and men didn't hold hands.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

NO GUARD ON THE CANADIAN BORDER

The Las Vegas Sun reports that there will be no national guard on the Canadian border insuring a non stop supply of Canadian celebrities that will take jobs American celebrities pass up

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

DA VINCI CODE

It's hard to believe the article in Reuters today Reading "Da Vinci Code" does alter beliefs. Who are these people that a mere work of fiction could alter their faith? I read the Da Vinci Code and really enjoyed it and can't wait to see the movie. And guess what I'm still a Catholic. Its FICTION....duh. Could it be you didn't have that much faith to begin with

Monday, May 15, 2006

WUK IS A THREE LETTER WORD


NEW YORK(AP) Hillary Clinton apologized to daughter Chelsea for saying that today's kids think work is a four letter word. She was always under the impression work was a three letter word

Sunday, May 14, 2006

HEY BIG SPENDER

The SaccBee reports the schools may be in for lots of cash
a $5.1biliion dollar increase in the budget. Of course no one needs to learn anything and we can still pass the kids without learning how to read above an 8th grade level.
Bob Wells, executive director of the Association of California School Administrators, said "districts would prefer that less of the money come with strings" Like making the kids actually learn something.

MATH WIZ PASSES AWAY

SAN FRANCISCO (AP) -- George Lenchner, a mathematician who founded the Math Olympiads tournaments for schoolchildren, has died, family members said Sunday. He was 22+2-2*4

Thursday, May 11, 2006

LOCKYER FOR TREASURER


Bill Lockyer's painting was unveiled for his new state treasurers office should he be elected. Unlike his other toilet painting this one is for free.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO COURIC


Saint Katie took Pastor Joel Osteen to the woodshed on the Today Show for making millions on his books. Quoted scripture from the Bible. However she failed to point out the evils of her $15million a year contact with CBS. What is that Biblical quote about a plank in your eye?

Thursday, May 04, 2006

TSUNAMI CAUSE FOUND

Tonga and the rest of the Western Pacific escaped what could have been terrible disaster if a large Tsunami had hit following the 7.9 earthquake that struck the region. However a small two foot Tsunami that followed was blamed on this man

In a related story New Orleans Mayor Nagin was asked what plans he had should a tsunami hit New Orleans? Mayor Nagin said they would pass out the following book.

WORLD'S OLDEST PERSON

According to REUTERS the world's oldest person Cruz Hernandez celebrated her 128th birthday by having cake forced fed to her. 30 minutes later she was rushed to the hospital with a blood sugar of over 400.

DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY GETTING NASTY

The Democratic primary for governor has certainly turned nasty. Today Phil Angelides and Steve Westly bumped into each other in the showers at the Capitol Athletic Club. Phil Angelides immediately called a press conference to tell the media what he saw.
Steve Westly was quick on the rebuttal as to what Phil actually saw.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

SPIN THE WHEEL


From the Bee Capitol Bureau Phil Angelides got the nod from the Democratic Convention. It comes as no surprise, his tax the rich scheme has the appeal to left coast politics. Nancy Pelosi complains that Steve Westly has been spending so much of his own money on tv ads. Well Westley spends his own money Angelides would like to spend yours.

IS TIME WARNER PRICE GOUGING?

The big story from AP today is the 60% gains in profits for Time Warner. The corporation earned $1.46 billion. Where is Senators Clinton and Schumer? Why no investigation into the price gouging. Why no cries against big publishing? Many elderly need to choose between food, drugs, gas or AOL. Its time to bring down my cable bill.

WHO MAKES YOUR LIST

Times Magazine has its list of the 100 people that are transforming our world. Some of the renown transformers are Dixie Chicks I guess because they said
"Just so you know, we're ashamed the President of the United States is from Texas," Another all star is George Clooney I guess because he finally heard about the Sudan. Little late getting on that bus. And still another is Reese Witherspoon because...Well just because. Time Magazine calls them 100 people that shape our world. Maybe the Times world but not mine. The 100's of Doctors and nurses, technicians, firefighters, paramedics, police and therapist that I work with shape my world and make a huge difference in the life of a stranger. Of course they don't make millions or have a publicists to write about them and they don't give themselves awards every other month, they just go on doing what the do day after day never expecting an award.